Question

    As the parent of a 7-year-old boy, sometimes I feel like “no” is my most frequently said word. But if I look honestly at the big picture of my daily vocabulary, I probably would conclude that it actually contains too much “yes”. Saying yes means opening myself up to new experiences, inviting new or deeper relationships. But too much “yes”  leaves  any  of  us  feeling  anxious,  overcommitted（过分受约束的）and  powerless  to  set  and  maintain boundaries in our lives.

This had been on my mind when The Book of No: 365 Ways to Say It and Mean It－and Stop People-Pleasing.

Forever came across my desk. The new edition of this decade-old book by psychologist Susan Newman is a must-read book for those of us who struggle to say “no” with authenticity, confidence and kindness.

Newman calls people who feel forced to say yes all their way through life “people-pleasers”. The chief symptoms of this condition include associating helping others with your self-respect, holding expectations that you will  care  for  others  and  feeling  unwilling  to  state  your  own  needs  when  a  request  comes  your  way.  For people-pleasers, “yes is the path of least resistance and the way to avoid damaging your relationship with the asker,” Newman writes.

The book offers brief dialogues for hundreds of scenarios in which “no” is the right answer, for reasons ranging from time management to financial pressures to emotional boundaries. Newman considers what came about among friends, at work, within families and in parenting. Reading through the scenarios, I realized they have some things in common－things that immediately started helping me improve my “no” skills.

Do you think this book might be helpful to you? It’s OK if the answer is “no”, but I do highly recommend it for your Positive Reading List shelf.

1.Why does the author include his own personal experience in Paragraph 1?

A. To blame himself. B. To show how to guide kids.

C. To tell his likes and dislikes. D. To help recommend a book.

2.What is mainly talked about in Paragraph 3?

A. How to deal with a request.

B. Why askers turn to others for a favor.

C. Why people-pleasers say “yes” too often.

D. How to strengthen relationships with askers.

3.What does the underlined word “scenarios” probably mean?

A. Occasions. B. Processes.

C. Adventures. D. Stories.

4.What does the author advise us to do?

A. Give no response to any demand.

B. Learn to say “no” in a positive way.

C. Keep open all channels of communication.

D. Say “yes” constantly without feeling guilty.

Answer

1.D

2.C

3.A

4.B

【解析】

说“是”意味着让自己接受新的体验，邀请新的或更深层次的关系。但是，太多的“是”让我们感到焦虑、过度承诺和无力在我们的生活中设定和维持界限。本文建议我们学会用积极的方式说“不”。

1.推理判断题。根据第一段中But too much “yes” leaves any of us feeling anxious, overcommitted（过分受约束的）and powerless to set and maintain boundaries in our lives.和第二段中The new edition of this decade-old book by psychologist Susan Newman is a must-read book for those of us who struggle to say “no” with authenticity, confidence and kindness.可知，作者在第1段中包含了他自己的个人经历是为了推荐一本书。故选D。

2.段落大意题。根据第三段中Newman calls people who feel forced to say yes all their way through life “people-pleasers”. 和 For people-pleasers, “yes is the path of least resistance and the way to avoid damaging your relationship with the asker,” Newman writes.可知，第三段主要谈论的是“为什么取悦别人的人总是说“是”。”故选C。

3.词义猜测题。根据倒数第二段中Newman considers what came about among friends, at work, within families and in parenting. （Newman考虑了朋友、工作、家庭和养育子女之间的关系。）Reading through the scenarios, I realized they have some things in common－things that immediately started helping me improve my “no” skills.（通过阅读这些场景，我意识到他们有一些共同的事情，这些事情立即开始帮助我提高我的“不”技能。）由此可知划线词的意思是“场合，场景”，故选A。

4.推理判断题。根据最后一段Do you think this book might be helpful to you? It’s OK if the answer is “no”, but I do highly recommend it for your Positive Reading List shelf.可知，作者建议我们学会用积极的方式说“不”。故选B。