Li Hua, who has just been awarded with the title of Merit Student of the City, is the model that we should learn from.
Li Hua, monitor and the chairman of the Students’ Union of our school, likes reading, sports and mountain climbing. She is good at delivering speeches, oral English speaking and playing the piano as well. With her hard work, she once won the champion of the School English Speech Contest . Besides, she came first in the talent show of our school. Li Hua, considered as optimistic and versatile, is liked by both students and teachers.
【解析】
本篇书面表达属于应用文,要求写一篇人物介绍。
第一步:
审题:人物介绍
人称:第三人称
时态:一般现在时
结构:分两部分,第一部分说明李华被评为“市三好学生”,第二部分介绍李华的基本情况。
要点:
1. 说明李华被评为“市三好学生”
2.介绍李华的基本情况
①现任职务:学校学生会主席、班长
②兴趣爱好:阅读、运动、登山
③特长:演讲、英语口语、钢琴
④曾获奖项:学校英语演讲比赛一等奖、校园才艺大赛第一名
⑤师生评价:乐观开朗、多才多艺,深受师生喜爱
第二步:列提纲(重点词汇、短语)
be awarded with;learn from;be good at;deliver speeches;play the piano;win the champion;come first;the talent show;be considered as;optimistic;versatile
第三步:连词成句
(1)Li Hua has just been awarded with the title of Merit Student of the City.
(2) Li Hua is the model that we learn from.
(3) Li Hua is monitor and the chairman of the Students’ Union of our school.
(4) Lihua likes reading, sports and mountain climbing.
(5)She is good at delivering speeches, oral English speaking and playing the piano as well.
(6) She once won the champion of the School English Speech Contest.
(7) She came first in the talent show of our school.
(8)Li Hua is considered as optimistic and versatile.
(9) She is liked by both students and teachers.
根据提示和关键词进行遣词造句,适当地运用句型,注意时态和主谓一致问题。
第四步:连句成篇(衔接词、亮点词汇)
将第1个句子做定语从句,连接下面的两个句子
(1)Li Hua has just been awarded with the title of Merit Student of the City.
(2) Li Hua is the model that we learn from.
→Li Hua, who has just been awarded with the title of Merit Student of the City, is the model that we should learn from.
用表示递进关系的词连接下面两个句子
(6) She once won the champion of the School English Speech Contest.
(7) She came first in the talent show of our school.
→ She once won the champion of the School English Speech Contest. Besides, she came first in the talent show of our school.
→ She once won the champion of the School English Speech Contest. In addition, she came first in the talent show of our school.
→ She once won the champion of the School English Speech Contest. What’s more, she came first in the talent show of our school.
将第1个句子改写为分词做状语,连接下面的两个句子
(8)Li Hua is considered as optimistic and versatile.
(9) She is liked by both students and teachers.
→Considered as optimistic and versatile, Li Hua is liked by both students and teachers.
适当地运用高级词汇、复杂句式提升文章的档次,增加文章的可读性。